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PSYCHOTHERAPYHELP NEWS
-- May 2005
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Runaway Bride or BPD?
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IN THIS ISSUE
** BPD Characteristics
** Almost Perfect?
** BPD Irresponsibility
** A Second Chance?
** BPD a Medical Disease?
** New CD Program: "Metamorphosis: Time for a
Change"
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Greetings
Ah ... the news is buzzing with the disappearance and return
of Jennifer Wilbank. Just a runaway bride? I don't think so. Could the
circumstances and the premeditation of her disappearance smack of something
much deeper: Borderline Personality Disorder? I want to thank my readers for
sending in their questions and I will attempt to answer them in this
newsletter. Please continue to contact me ... I'll try to address your concerns
in future newsletters.
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** Is This Saga of the Missing Bride, Jennifer Wilbank, just
another case of Borderline Personality Disorder?
I am not permitted to render a diagnosis about someone with
whom I have not had sufficient clinical interviews. However, I can make a
provisional assessment based on my interpretations of information as presented
by the media. As the story develops and unfolds, it does contain elements
suggestive of a borderline cluster meltdown.
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** Can You Elaborate on that?
In my book, "Borderline Personality Disorder: A
Profile," I list several characteristics common to borderline cluster
behaviors. First, there is the feeling of being over-whelmed and then trying to
escape from such feelings by "Acting Out." Deception is part of the
act out, followed by a complete ignorance and denial of the effects of one's
behavior on other people. This lack of empathy and sensitivity to the hurt
imposed by the acting out person is somewhat characteristic of the narcissistic
side of borderline regression.
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** But, the Family of Jennifer Wilbank seemed to insist that
she was an almost perfect person. Have you encountered that scenario?
It is not unusual for many disordered families to present to
the world a false façade of perfect functioning. I have worked with many
borderlines who insist that they are perfect, right and without blemish. They
reinforce this denial by using the mechanism of blaming others and outside
forces for their acting out and extremely dishonest and destructive behavior.
Many borderline personalities have developed very charming, charismatic,
attractive and seductive frontline personas. Don't be fooled by this front.
Remember that old maxim, "Don't judge a book by its cover!" Beauty on
the outside may just be a cover up for a lot of destructive, evil and distorted
internal impulses. Borderlines do act impulsively and seem to lack neocortical
self-control and judgment. They are emotionally immature, depressed, anxious
and infantile in their coping mechanisms.
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** This Lying and Deception Seems Intended to Cover Up and
Dismiss Self-Responsibility for unacceptable feelings. What role does
irresponsibility Play in Borderline Acting Out?
The underlying feelings of fear, betrayal, deception, lying
and depression reveal a sinister regressive dark side to the borderline
personality. Simple honest discussion and problem resolution are entertained
and are instead, replaced by dangerous acting out drama that causes a lot of
trouble for everyone involved.
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* Would You
Recommend that the Partner of such a Personality Disturbed Individual Should
Give them a Second Chance?
The decision to do anything is always up to the individual.
But, I would personally listen very closely to the danger signals being sent by
borderline behavior. Trouble reveals itself by acting out behavior and looks
for ways for establishing a revolving door, cyclic returning of more trouble. I
do not believe that highly regressed borderline people are really suitable for
intimate relationships. The prospect of more intimacy, that is anticipated in a
close relationship, is like a gunpowder trigger. It will set off an explosion,
hurt feelings and chaos. Unstable feelings and chronic swinging back and forth
are the pure ingredients for insanity. Why volunteer for such a struggle?! The
best hedge against borderline destruction is knowledge about the disorder. The
good news is: exposure to borderline phenomenon is a good, but painful way for
learning how to advance to higher spiritual consciousness. Borderline phenomena
is unstable at the first and second chakra levels. Partners and ex-lovers of
borderlines have an opportunity to grow spiritually and eventually realize true
soulmate coupling. The end result can be a union and a life characteristic of
the spiritual realm called Paradise. But, be prepared to spend certain amounts
of time in relationship/spiritual hell as a required training ground for
advanced cosmic consciousness.
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** Is a Borderline Cluster Disorder a Medical Disease?
Yes and no ... On one hand, childhood trauma should be
emphasized. But, the evil, disordered behavior can never be fully accepted. So,
you have this ambivalent mix of empathy for the inner traumatic pain, coupled
with aversion for the destructive parts of the self. Personally, I have great
empathy for the acknowledged inner pain of the borderline. I have absolutely no
tolerance for the outward destructive behavior and the sinister internal demons
of the borderline.
It is helpful to view borderline personality cluster
disorders as being medical. It is also a group of disorders characterized by
disturbances in spirit, soul, emotion and thinking. Because of the combination
of all of these factors, people who suffer from borderline cluster disorders,
have great trouble with interpersonal relationships and feelings concerning
identity. Disruptions in the neocortex make it very difficult for borderline
individuals to monitor and control destructive impulses. Medical treatment is
certainly recommended, along with relationship, spiritual, nutritional,
cognitive and deep feeling therapies.
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** NEW CD Program: "Metamorphosis"
"Metamorphosis: Time for a Change"" is one of
my new CD programs. It is absolutely mind boggling, wonderful, and emotion
evoking. It focuses on how to maintain and sustain stability of mood and mind
through profound learning principles and guided meditations. Layered with
beautiful music, "Metamorphosis" will lift your spirit and your soul.
It is healing ... excellent for those with BPD, partners of
BPD, and those who wish to change their internal and external circumstances.
Dr. Hannig has done all the work for you. Just sit back, listen, take in the
meditations, reflect on the prayer in Psalms 101, and experience a whole new
perspective. Then, watch your life change!
SPECIAL: order "Borderline Personality Disorder"
and "Metamorphosis" for only $22 plus shipping! Email to ask us how.
For more information, go to
http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/services/item.nhtml?profile=services&UID=99
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Quick Links
Go to
http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/mood1anxiety1personalitydisorders/ to read more
about Personality Disorders ...
Go to http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/soulmatesfromhell/ to
read "Soulmates from Hell". If you are in such a relationship, I
recommend my book "Coping with the Disorder". Go to
http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/services/item.nhtml?profile=services&UID=60
for more info about "Coping with the Disorder".
Telephone Therapy is highly successful. There's no need to
go beyond the comfort, convenience, and privacy of your home. Go to
http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/telephonetherapy/ for more info ...
Explore PsychotherapyHELP. Download free articles, gather
in-depth information, and email me with your questions. Click
http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/door/ to go to PsychotherapyHELP ...
It is much easier for me to answer your questions by email.
In fact, I may even feature them (anonymously, of course) in one of our
newsletters, but only with your permission. So, please contact me directly at
phannigphd@socal.rr.com. Since it is difficult during therapy hours to answer
your questions by telephone, email seems to work out best. So, keep those
questions coming over the internet.
Warmest Regards,
Paul J. Hannig, Ph.D. MFCC
mailto:phannigphd@socal.rr.comwww.nvo.com/psych_help