When most people start to talk they usually end up in some kind of trouble or their words cause trouble and discomfort for other people. Words in such a context are usually used to defend, distance and disguise real feelings.
Words can be used constructively and destructively. Have you ever said or wanted to say, "Shut up and feel" to someone? Well, I have. I believe in minimizing the use of words to emphasize the lost art and healing power of deep feelings. To that extent, I promote a deep feeling therapy concept in which words are greatly reduced because they do not cure anyone. At best, they are only minimally helpful in resolving repressed pain at the deepest levels of human consciousness.
Time spent on the floor feeling is very vital in the curing and healing of deep pain. Time spent talking about feelings is one step removed from being in the experience of fully feeling one's pain. People spend most of their lives in their heads, conversing with themselves and other phantom characters. These same people spend very little time deep in their most precious lost feelings; then they engage themselves with others in verbal duels that are meant to influence, defend or coerce someone to accept their own viewpoints.
Such verbal shenanigans merely reinforce repression and strengthen neurosis while further obliterating the real self; the self that feels, teaches and heals. "Shut up and feel" may be the most therapeutic statement of the 21st century. "Get out of your head and into your guts" may be the most influential words one could ever utter to steer a person toward the real self.
If one wishes to be healed of long standing, deeply buried hurts and other emotions, it cannot be done simply through the medium of words. One may be able to make superficial changes and solve certain problems. Words must lead to experience and experience must involve real deep feelings, if one is ever going to heal long standing deeply rooted problems. The royal road to a peak experience and a peak life is through the deepest expression of one's most vital emotions. It is through this deeply felt, fully organic, bottom line expression that long standing disorders are resolved at the most profound visceral, nervous system level.
All disorders have at their roots, some aspect of painful distortion and suppression of feeling. Through a very deeply felt, fully expressed emotion, one becomes freed of the distorting effects of words, disordered thoughts and body armoring. A defended life is a life built on the treacherous murder of deep emotions and the lies of verbal defenses that serve to only distance oneself from one's own true real essence.
Back in the early sixties, my wife (at that time) dragged me to a psycho-dynamically oriented therapist. I went to him once or twice a week for about a year or two. He would sit opposite from me, smoking a cigar and ask about my dreams and my relationship with my father. I tried to cooperate. It never occurred to him that I was married to the wrong woman. I got nothing out of the therapy, especially myself. I did get one thing though: the idea that I could do what he was doing. So I passionately entered college and studied the great ideas of our century and the past.
After graduation, I took a job at Philadelphia State Hospital. It was here that I was exposed to the real world of experiential, existential psychotherapy. The experience saved and changed my life. I was introduced to a whole new world of honesty, congruence, feeling and authenticity. I was exposed to real emotion and I saw the healing power there. However, in the four years that I trained and supervised mental health personnel, I do not remember any outstanding interpretations that were presented to me. It was the experiences and not the psychoanalytic interpretations that made the difference in my being and in my life.
During one episode in which I was supervising two mental health counselors, I observed that what they were talking about was not what they were really talking about. Although, words were in the midst of their conflict with one another, the real issues seemed to be deeply buried in their past family life. Could they be talking about one thing and unaware of the real issues that lay buried in some world deep inside of themselves?
I made an intervention concerning the fact that I saw their pain coming from the past. They immediately stopped arguing and the conflict shifted focus from each other to their deep inner worlds. Their conflict with one another ended once they discovered that the source laid within. Later on, sitting in a sensitivity training group, I suddenly became painfully aware of being cut off from my own gut feelings. It was at that moment that I resolved to go on a long journey to recover my cut off emotions. I began the search for my feelings by reading books on gestalt therapy, bio-energetics, reichian therapy, primal integration therapy and anything else I could get my hands on.
John Lilly's and Joseph Chilton Pearce's ideas of self-experimentation, unlimited thinking, and gathering one's tools, props and mentors brought me into contact with the right people. Bob Martin, my teacher and mentor at Philadelphia State Hospital, introduced and exposed me to the use of music in individual and group sessions. My first experience threw me tearfully back to my childhood and I felt a shift in my very being. My first deep feeling experience was done in the living room of my own home where my feelings blew open and took me back to being a baby crying out to my mother to come and help me.
At that point, the die was cast. I embarked on the most profound and deep exploration into my very being. There was no looking back at any other more superficial methods. I had found the Holy Grail ... the key ... the entrance and gateway into the most profound, effective, and oldest healing method known to life.
As I went into this world, rivers, oceans, continents and universes of feelings came pouring out of me. There were no limits. Thirty plus years later, there are still no limits to what I can feel and discover about myself, life, God, and other people. The most profound mysteries suddenly and continuously opened up for me to fully feel and experience. I was an open being, someone from another place that this world had left behind and forgotten. I was a new creature who looked like everyone else, but on the inside I was an open universe.
I became the peak experience, a creature of infinite bliss and happiness. Joy was my natural state of being and love was my life's blood. I was what everyone dreamed about becoming. I was me and joy, bliss, and ecstasy were my emotional reality. Even in the midst of catastrophic illness, financial troubles, or interpersonal failure, I became the epitome of absolute happiness. I became me -- an irrevocable, untrammeled, imperfect, total human being ... of being and more being. Nothing could change that essence. I had felt my way into the Kingdom of Heaven here on earth and external circumstances had nothing to do with it. I had arrived by my own will with the desire to feel all of me - to expose me to me - and to rid me of the pain, defenses and blocks of the past.
I faced myself head on, straight and steadfast. I could hit the floor and blow out just about any feeling and I could achieve a state of being beyond my wildest dreams. I even found a woman who wanted and did the same thing. Purity was only a feeling away. Whenever I felt off center or wandered in my own mind, I could always HIT THE FLOOR, blow out the feeling and integrate the very truth of existence.
Now, more than 30 years later, hundreds upon hundreds of people have passed through my door for deep feeling therapy and have experienced the same transformation. These methods work for those who utilize them passionately.